(Translated upon request)
I was skimming through the article about homosexuality in the Arabic Language Wikipedia (I was taken aback by the lack of name calling and cursing of gays and lesbians in the beginning, though I then reminded myself that this was Wikipedia we were talking about, not some anonymous youtube comments on a video about homosexuality!). Back on topic, parts of the article I was not a fan of. For instance, they used really outdated studies from 1972(!) and 1978 (!) to tell us that gays and lesbians are more prone to psychological problems than straights (which is total bunk). Another point they made which I found equally offensive, and which is also our topic here, is what the authors of the article called the “underlying reasons for homosexuality”. Though the article states in two different places that people cannot choose what gender they are attracted to, it goes on to give us the reasons that us gays and lesbians become attracted to the same gender, which are as follows: sexual assault or molestation, one’s relationship with the same gender parent, one’s relationship with the opposite gender parents, and one’s relationship with one’s peers.
Now, time for a confession; when I was about seven years old, I was molested. Though the event lasted for less than a minute and did not reach the level of rape, it was still an assault. My second admission is that I have never been close to my mother. Though I love her a lot and would give my life for her sake if needed, I do not share my secrets and pain and dreams, as that we don’t have that kind of relationship.
So what does the aforementioned confessions mean?
Nothing at all. Sexual violence against women and children is a world wide crisis. As I was both a child and female my assault is unsurprising, unfortunately, and that is the way for most of the women of the world. So if that was a reason that turned people gay, why aren’t most women lesbians?
As for my relationship with my same gendered parent, that is merely one example. What about the many more gays and lesbians with very strong and close family ties? And what of straight people with familial issues? Why are these gay and those straight?
I have known that I was a lesbian ever since I was a child, though I was not aware of the vocabulary to express what I was till much later. What about you? When did you know you were gay? Are there “reasons” for your homosexuality?